The fourth provision: enough care. Chapter 8 (1/1)

Andrew Wake Newsletter, Parenting

Hi to all.

Strategies and a plan to implement them are a vital part of creating change.  The newsletter next week will be about boundaries and how they can be used to create change.

However, boundaries without enough care can result in an increase in combative interactions between you and your children.  “I don’t care what you think until I think that you care” is a well known saying.  To interact with your child with strong boundaries and walls, but inadequate care can make your home life feel a bit like prison…not how most of us want our families to be.

Providing love and affection is difficult in the face of provocation, but our role as parents is to be stronger, wiser, more patient, and calmer in the face of strong emotions and tricky behaviours.

Empathy and asking the question, “How can I relate to what my child is doing / feeling?”, can be a powerful way to turn on our mammal and human brain, and make it less likely we will enforce boundaries without the associated experience of them being cared for at the same time.

The video can be found here.