You can buy The Good Enough Parent (Book or eBook) at the following locations.
Book Distribution – Woodslane
Goodreads rating 4.3/5
Lizbeth Amazon review
“I wish this book had been around for me 15 years ago. It is hands down the most useful thing I have read in years – every chapter seemed to bring another lightbulb moment, and an understanding of logic-defying behaviours that had always left me bewildered. With two teenagers in the house, and one with longstanding mental health and behavioural issues, I have lost count of the parenting books I have waded through. All those books seemed to assume that your children would respond well to the strategies and all your problems would be solved immediately – but my children never did what they were meant to! One of the things I love about Andrew Wake’s book is that he prepares you for negative responses (in fact almost assumes they will happen) – so you know exactly what to do next. He even frames those frustrating responses as a chance to celebrate your child’s opportunity to learn!
The key to the book is in the simple way Andrew explains attachment issues and how the different parts of our brain control our emotions and behaviours. I can now see how our “reptile brain” responds when it feels unsafe (a reptile doesn’t respond nicely, by the way …), how our “mammal brain” responds when it feels insecure, and how those parts of our brain need to be soothed before the “human brain” can sit down and discuss anything logically. I realise now that I probably responded fairly reasonably to my children’s behaviour – but timing was everything, and I had no idea .. (Note to self: Don’t try logic with anyone in reptilian mode. Help them feel safe first.)
This book is full of simple, practical step by step plans for responding to difficult behaviour. Andrew acknowledges that both the child and parent needs to feel safe before anything else can change, and highlights the importance of having a plan. I almost cried when I read that – during many years of seeking help for my child in crisis this was one of the things that I kept on asking for but rarely succeeded in getting. To have that need acknowledged is such a relief I can’t tell you.
Seriously – this is an amazing book. I would recommend it to everyone, no matter how easy or difficult your child or adolescent”.